Selena Gomez grieved not being able to carry children due to health issues

Selena Gomez of "Emilia Perez" at the Deadline Studio held at the Bisha Hotel during the Toronto International Film Festival 2024 on September 8, 2024 in Toronto, Canada. (Photo by KC Armstrong/Deadline via Getty Images)

Selena Gomez has been transparent about both her mental and physical health challenges over her more than two decades in the industry, but the actress turned pop star is revealing for the very first time another heartbreaking obstacle she's had to work through.

"I haven’t ever said this," the "Emilia Perez" star told Vanity Fair. "But I unfortunately can’t carry my own children. I have a lot of medical issues that would put my life and the baby’s in jeopardy."

"That was something I had to grieve for a while."

In 2013, Gomez was diagnosed with lupus, an autoimmune diease where the body attacks its own healthy tissue. She underwent chemotherapy and in 2017, at age 24, she had a kidney transplant, due to complications from the disease.

"It’s not necessarily the way I envisioned it," Gomez continued of her path to motherhood. "I thought it would happen the way it happens for everyone. [But] I’m in a much better place with that. I find it a blessing that there are wonderful people willing to do surrogacy or adoption, which are both huge possibilities for me."

Gomez's family has already been impacted by the latter. Her mother, Mandy Teefey, was adopted. "I probably wouldn’t be here [if my mom wasn't adopted.] I don’t know what her life would’ve been like. She and I are very thankful for how life played out."

In terms of having options, the "Only Murders in the Building" star is grateful. "It made me really thankful for the other outlets for people who are dying to be moms. I’m one of those people," she admitted. "I’m excited for what that journey will look like, but it’ll look a little different. At the end of the day, I don’t care. It’ll be mine. It’ll be my baby."

Up until July 2023, when she met her now boyfriend, music producer Benny Blanco, Gomez had been single for five years. Even without a partner, Gomez says she'd intended to expand her family by 35.

"Before I met my boyfriend, I was single for five years, with the exception of going on a few dates," she disclosed. "And I was like, ‘OK, if this is the vibe, then what is the most important thing to me? Family.’"

Gomez, who has been linked to several other high-profile stars, including Justin Bieber, The Weeknd and Nick Jonas, raved about her relationship with Blanco. "I’ve never been loved this way," she said. "He’s just been a light. A complete light in my life. He’s my best friend. I love telling him everything."

And even though things are going well between the couple, Gomez says she isn't in a rush to get married. "We always make sure we’re protecting what we have, but there’s no rules," she said. "I want him to always be himself. I always want to be myself."

Being herself also means no future name deviations. "I’m not changing my name no matter what. I am Selena Gomez. That’s it."

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